[Closed Post] ..the sky will come for you once..

[lanselos_du_lac]

The day is warm and bright -- it's lovely, in fact -- and so Lancelot is doing his best to ignore the strange tension that has been dogging him over the last few days. He is, of course, keeping to his usual routine, which helps, and now he is in the little clearing where he and Magnus meet for training. He's waiting for Magnus to arrive, checking the straps of Arthur's shield while he waits, and doing his best to clear his head and focus up on what he has determined they need to focus on today.

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[lanselos_du_lac]

"No one is hurt, no. Only my head is elsewhere, and I did not think I was doing well enough by Magnus."

[quote_gentle_unquote]

Susan sets her pen to the side, and Regina immediately tackles it, sending it spinning off the desk and onto the ground. Ignoring the cat as she leaps after it, closing her notebook on the words Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian - October???, Susan leans forward. "What is it?"

[lanselos_du_lac]

Almost automatically, he says, "It is nothing."

He has his things put away, now, and he hesitates -- he has that same buzzing, frizzing feeling as before. "No," he says, a little carefully. He takes a breath, scrubs a hand over his face. "It is many things. I cannot sort it out."

[quote_gentle_unquote]

Susan rises and circles the desk, approaching him, curling a hand around his face and leaning up for a hello kiss. "Shall I help?"

[lanselos_du_lac]

Lancelot softens at this, "An thou canst, yes." And he does bend to kiss her, sweetly.

[quote_gentle_unquote]

She smiles at him as she draws back, then takes a single step away to snag her ubiquitous mug of tea - this one is half-finished - before nudging him in the direction of the sofa. "Sit," she urges. "And tell me what's on your mind."

[lanselos_du_lac]

He sighs a little and does as she says, his expression thoughtful. Despite the nervous buzzing, he knows the question will continue to distract him if he doesn't ask it. "First I have a question -- didst thou speak with Magnus, about our training arrangement?"

[quote_gentle_unquote]

"Yes, of course. Several weeks ago now, I think. Didn't I mention it?" (She absolutely did not. She had intended to, but was distracted by the arrival of the beach.)

[lanselos_du_lac]

"No, thou didst not." He sits for a moment, working to stifle the frown that is impending. "Why didst thou?"

[quote_gentle_unquote]

"Well, because the secrecy had gone on for quite long enough, hadn't it? Months and months and months."

[lanselos_du_lac]

"Why was that a concern?" It's a sincere question, even if there is an unusual note of testiness behind it.

[quote_gentle_unquote]

Susan glances at Lancelot, surprised by that note, especially given that he knows she's never cared for this particular arrangement. She offers him her mug, in case he might like a sip of tea, and says, "He was taking advantage of your goodwill. You ought to be able to talk about your day with your friends." This is putting her concerns very lightly, of course, but there's a queer look to his face that she can't quite parse.

[lanselos_du_lac]

"He wasn't. I knew what he was asking me for and I would not have agreed if I misliked it. All that mattered to me was that I could speak of it to thee, so thou wouldst know where I might be."

[quote_gentle_unquote]

Susan's chin lifts in the way it always does when she's feeling either indignant, stubborn, or insecure. It's likely a less-familiar posture for Lancelot. "Yes," she says. "I know you said that."

[lanselos_du_lac]

It is less familiar, on Susan, but there's a quality to it that sends a pulse of anxiety through him. He sits up a little straighter, levels and lowers his voice. "I did say so, because it was truth."

[quote_gentle_unquote]

Since he isn't taking her tea, Susan leans to set it on the floor, then takes his hands in hers and laces their fingers together. "You oughtn't need to keep secrets."

[lanselos_du_lac]

"I have no secrets from thee," quietly.

[quote_gentle_unquote]

"I know you haven't," surprised. "Sweetheart, I wasn't concerned about me, I was concerned about you."

[lanselos_du_lac]

"Why?" There's that faint annoyance again, though he himself can't place its source. "I have told thee, all's well."

[quote_gentle_unquote]

"It mightn't bother you now, but I shouldn't want having to keep additional secrets to take a toll on you later."

[lanselos_du_lac]

"Then thou shouldst have spoken with me."

[quote_gentle_unquote]

"Yes, perhaps I should have." She's not convinced that would have made any sort of difference.

[lanselos_du_lac]

"Why didst thou not?"

[quote_gentle_unquote]

Susan does have the grace to look fleetingly embarrassed. "It seemed prudent to speak to Magnus. He often behaves thoughtlessly when he ought to consider the impact of his actions."

[lanselos_du_lac]

"It would be my place to speak to Magnus, were his actions harming me." His expression is still an odd mixture of upset, cautious, vaguely hurt. He keeps his hands in hers, though.