[Closed Post] ..the sky will come for you once..

[lanselos_du_lac]

The day is warm and bright -- it's lovely, in fact -- and so Lancelot is doing his best to ignore the strange tension that has been dogging him over the last few days. He is, of course, keeping to his usual routine, which helps, and now he is in the little clearing where he and Magnus meet for training. He's waiting for Magnus to arrive, checking the straps of Arthur's shield while he waits, and doing his best to clear his head and focus up on what he has determined they need to focus on today.

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[lanselos_du_lac]

Lancelot shakes his head, saying evenly, "No, Magnus. It is naught to do with you. I just-- it is my fault. I should know better when I should beg off for a day."

[summerdude]

"Okay." Magnus hesitates a moment. "Do you, like. Need anything?"

[lanselos_du_lac]

"Only a little time," he says, trying to gentle his voice and clear his expression. He has a queer buzzing feeling -- all of his distractions and unsettled thoughts seem to be coming together, shaping into something he does not like.

Lancelot sheathes his sword and takes a breath. "Magnus, it's all right. I am not upset with you, and you've done nothing wrong. I am just off today. I would rather have a clear head when we spar. I can't be a good help to you otherwise."

[summerdude]

"Oh. Yeah, totally. Sure." Magnus doesn't state the obvious, which is that Lancelot is the first Sword Guy he's worked closely with who cares about stuff like headspace. He's pretty sure this is a good thing -- for Lancelot, at least, due to all of his trauma. "Um, feel better soon?"

[lanselos_du_lac]

Lancelot gives the tiniest of bows, "Thank you. We can begin again the day after tomorrow, as usual."

Then he leaves the clearing, setting off toward the mansion. He is annoyed with himself, still tense, obscurely nervous (?) at the knowledge that Susan confronted Magnus -- he had thought all was well, and that there was no cause for concern. He is mulling all of this over as he mounts the stairs; often, he would stop at his old room to stow his gear away, but today he simply goes straight to their shared room. He's watchful for Regina as he opens the door.

[quote_gentle_unquote]

Susan is sitting at the desk, in a simple shift she never wears outside of their room, hair loose and still drying from her morning's wash. Regina is on the desk next to her, 'helping' by batting her pen every time it moves. "Hello, sweetheart," she says, not looking up from her notebook. "How was training?"

[lanselos_du_lac]

His frown does ease at the sight of her, but he likely sounds troubled when he responds. "I cut it somewhat short, today."

He turns a little to the side to start removing and putting away his gear.

[quote_gentle_unquote]

Susan glances up at his tone and frowns, watching him sort himself out for a moment. "Is everything all right?" she asks, after a beat. "No one got hurt, I hope?"

[lanselos_du_lac]

"No one is hurt, no. Only my head is elsewhere, and I did not think I was doing well enough by Magnus."

[quote_gentle_unquote]

Susan sets her pen to the side, and Regina immediately tackles it, sending it spinning off the desk and onto the ground. Ignoring the cat as she leaps after it, closing her notebook on the words Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian - October???, Susan leans forward. "What is it?"

[lanselos_du_lac]

Almost automatically, he says, "It is nothing."

He has his things put away, now, and he hesitates -- he has that same buzzing, frizzing feeling as before. "No," he says, a little carefully. He takes a breath, scrubs a hand over his face. "It is many things. I cannot sort it out."

[quote_gentle_unquote]

Susan rises and circles the desk, approaching him, curling a hand around his face and leaning up for a hello kiss. "Shall I help?"

[lanselos_du_lac]

Lancelot softens at this, "An thou canst, yes." And he does bend to kiss her, sweetly.

[quote_gentle_unquote]

She smiles at him as she draws back, then takes a single step away to snag her ubiquitous mug of tea - this one is half-finished - before nudging him in the direction of the sofa. "Sit," she urges. "And tell me what's on your mind."

[lanselos_du_lac]

He sighs a little and does as she says, his expression thoughtful. Despite the nervous buzzing, he knows the question will continue to distract him if he doesn't ask it. "First I have a question -- didst thou speak with Magnus, about our training arrangement?"

[quote_gentle_unquote]

"Yes, of course. Several weeks ago now, I think. Didn't I mention it?" (She absolutely did not. She had intended to, but was distracted by the arrival of the beach.)

[lanselos_du_lac]

"No, thou didst not." He sits for a moment, working to stifle the frown that is impending. "Why didst thou?"

[quote_gentle_unquote]

"Well, because the secrecy had gone on for quite long enough, hadn't it? Months and months and months."

[lanselos_du_lac]

"Why was that a concern?" It's a sincere question, even if there is an unusual note of testiness behind it.

[quote_gentle_unquote]

Susan glances at Lancelot, surprised by that note, especially given that he knows she's never cared for this particular arrangement. She offers him her mug, in case he might like a sip of tea, and says, "He was taking advantage of your goodwill. You ought to be able to talk about your day with your friends." This is putting her concerns very lightly, of course, but there's a queer look to his face that she can't quite parse.

[lanselos_du_lac]

"He wasn't. I knew what he was asking me for and I would not have agreed if I misliked it. All that mattered to me was that I could speak of it to thee, so thou wouldst know where I might be."

[quote_gentle_unquote]

Susan's chin lifts in the way it always does when she's feeling either indignant, stubborn, or insecure. It's likely a less-familiar posture for Lancelot. "Yes," she says. "I know you said that."

[lanselos_du_lac]

It is less familiar, on Susan, but there's a quality to it that sends a pulse of anxiety through him. He sits up a little straighter, levels and lowers his voice. "I did say so, because it was truth."

[quote_gentle_unquote]

Since he isn't taking her tea, Susan leans to set it on the floor, then takes his hands in hers and laces their fingers together. "You oughtn't need to keep secrets."

[lanselos_du_lac]

"I have no secrets from thee," quietly.