"Perhaps you know of this already. Sagramore knows, we've spoken of it. Galahad told it to me that first meeting. Everyone at court knows, in their time," a little breath. He won't look at Laertes. "I did choose to lie with Galahad's mother, but I thought her to be the Queen. She-- I still know not how. She deceived me in order to lie with me. Until the next morning, I thought her to be Guinevere. I remember little enough, except that in the morning... there she was. Elaine. Not Guinevere. I chose it, but it sickens me to know it happened so easily."

He lets out a sigh. "I told the Queen, and she was furious with me. She sent me from her sight and would not hear any more from me. This is why I found a way to leave court. It has-- it's so hard to think of. It happened twenty years ago for them but not even a year for me. This must be when Galahad was begat. It is a... it is very painful. This is what drove me to such... with Galahad, that first day."